Do you want to be more confident? Brave? Loving? Kind? A calming parent? Or just a more consensus person?
I've learned and used a technique that has blown my mind over the last few weeks. It has changed me for the better, and I could see the results pretty quickly.
I realized that there were some traits I wanted to embody, with the big ones being confidence and bravery. So, I asked someone pretty smart about it. She gave me great advice that probably changed the trajectory of my life. I want to stress that right at first I didn't know if this would work, but it did with more power than I ever saw coming. That is why I am sharing it today. I want to give you the same opportunity to grow that she did.
Here's what I did: I started by writing down these traits on Post-it notes and placing them on my mirror. I look at these notes every morning and evening and reflect on how I’ve lived up to these traits throughout the day.
For example, if one of the notes says "Be Confident," I ask myself, "Did I act confidently today? If so, when? If not, what held me back?" This simple act of reflection helps me to be mindful of my actions and thoughts, and to align them with the person I want to become.
In addition to confidence, I wanted to be brave. I wanted to be brave in the sense of trying new things, not letting my anxiety take hold and just doing the scary tasks. So, when I feel overwhelmed by fear, I look at the Post-it note that reminds me to stay brave. It helps me take a deep breath, handle the situation with more calm thinking, and by putting one foot in front of the other.
One of the most powerful realizations I've had is that most negative self-talk I carry around has no connection with the traits I strive for. By regularly checking in with these notes I can let go of unnecessary fears and focus on becoming the person I want to be.
I can think of many traits you can put on your post-it notes. They include: healthy, calm, loving, and focused to name a few. There are a ton of options. If you have any I have missed, please add them in the comments.
The moment I realized it was working was when I started beating myself up with negative talk about having a fear of starting something new. I realized that wasn't aligned with the confidence, gratitude, and health that I was striving for. It was completely different from those. I noticed that I didn't want to feel the emotions those thoughts were giving me. I could feel that confident, grateful, and healthy people would handle problems such as having doubt and fear and beating themselves up for it completely differently. I stopped and thought about what those kinds of people would do. I decided to stop beating myself up and thought about how brave it was to stop in the moment and say, "I'm going to stop this right now because this doesn't align with my post-it notes that I look at it to find a better way." In doing this, I made a humongous change in my life. Yes, little post-its made this change. They might be small sheets of paper stuck to my mirror, but in a way, they also are a big way a changing force to be reckoned with. I can see how many doors it has opened with this and how many doors it will open as I progress, as I continue to use the tiny little post-its in the future.
I know that most of you will choose different traits than I did, but no matter what trait you pick I know you will probably notice negative thinking like I did. For example, if you choose focus or being calmer, I know you will see the negative self-talk that has inhibited you from gaining traction with your goal.
I have been completely blown away by how the changes occurred over the last few weeks. It was also in a different way than I expected. I wasn't sure at first if I would even look at the post-its. I also can't believe how many weeks I have stuck with it. Most likely I kept with it because I have seen such results with it in my life.
If you do this with your post-its tell us how well it went in the comments. I definitely would like to know how it worked for everyone. I will even go out on a limb and say it works for most of you. I know that is a big assumption, but I like how easy it was to make this work in my life. I do know that I am nurturing the growth. It isn't just because there are Post-it notes on my mirror
I hope you can see the impact this has created in my life. I cannot tell you how much I want this to change yours.
Now go. Be safe. Know that you are not alone.
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